So I have realized that I haven't done much posting about life lately-I do to many little blurbs on Facebook, but need to get back to documenting the sometimes crazy, sometimes mundane life I lead.
This morning I wanted to scream at traffic. I wanted to be a traffic officer to direct traffic. I have a huge pet peave. It is when people are turning against traffic and get stuck in the intersection then block the traffic for the people going through the intersection. It happens just outside my townhomes, then again at the major intersection I have to go through every morning. It makes me go crazy. For crying out loud, if you aren't going to make it through the light, do not go into the intersection!!! Cannot express my annoyance for this. Well, guess I just did.
Here's a mommy question. Am I a bad mother for not giving my kids a bath everyday? I was a friend's house today and was trying to get my kids ready to go. I said "come on we have to go so we can eat dinner and then it's bath night." She said "what do you mean bath 'night" in a way that she couldn't belive that I didn't bathe my kids every night. I said in the winter if they don't go out and get dirty, they get a bath every other night, unless we do something that gets them really dirty. Sometimes I am do tired by the end of the night that I feel like they are lucky they get one every other night!!
Next thought-New Years Resolutions. Do them? Don't do them? At testimony meeting last week one of the sisters mentioned that she loved new beginnings-even loves Monday Mornings. I felt a little bit of the same. I do like new beginnings. So I have been thinking about myself, what to do to change, become better, grow and develope. I realized I need balance. I am a wife, mother, sister, friend, visiting teacher, primary teacher, aunt, neighbor, volunteer, and sometimes feel like a nurse, chef, maid, and chaffeur. I have a hard time balancing it all. I tend to focus too much on one thing and then something else suffers. More often than not, the state of my house. I was in a huge funk the other morning -feeling sorry for myself, thinking that I won't be "known" for something, that I am mediocre at a lot of things, but not really good at any one thing. I got the impression that I need to focus on being a good mom and good primary teacher. So this year I plan to do my primary lesson during the week instead of waiting until Saturday evening, and to not yell at the kids and to play with them when they ask instead of putting them off.
Speaking of that, this morning was great. I spent time with Spencer doing some workbooks on writing the alphabet and learning colors, shapes etc. He is so cute-he concentrates so hard on writing the letters. I feel bad that I have waited so long to get him writing etc. Anyhow, he was so excited when he would finish and was thrilled to get a star sticker on his page. Then the boys begged me to play "Mario" a new Wii game Darin got for Christmas. The love it. Then we played Donkey Kong-the other game Darin asked for. I actually love the Donkey Kong one more than I expected. What I enjoyed most was spending the time with the boys. They were cute trying to tell me what to do on Mario-they love to watch Darin play it.
Another deep thought:what if I am really not good at something I want so much to do? Realistically, what If I can never figure it out? And yes, I am speaking of photography here. I did a photo shoot last weekend, and am not happy with the pictures. The are boring. Honestly. I thought I could do it inside, but apparently I need tons more practice inside. I do fairly well outside, but I have to figure out inside. So when I pulled them up I was disappointed. And I shot in RAW, so there was a different page that came up on Photoshop elements, so now I am not sure if I can edit them the way I did the last ones I did. Ugh. So my question really is this: When do you decide that you really aren't good at something? Well, I am not completely ready to give up-I am going to take another class-hopefully better than the last one.
Tonight was one of those crazy nights. Spencer fell asleep in the car and went right to the couch when we got home. I made dinner, then when I went over to try to wake him up, he was burning up. He has a temp of 102. It was so weird-like it suddenly came on. So we took him up. He wanted to go right to bed. Landon has been coughing a lot today and was a bit wheezy, so at one point of the night, Darin was out buying motrin, I was giving Landon a breathing treatment, Spencer was asleep and Jordan was still in the tub. I did think to myself when I was holding Landon that "this is my life-the life of a mother. It is what I wanted and it is hard, but deep down, I love it." I had a really nice time reading with Jordan and she has only come out of her bed once.
So, currently I am on the couch with my lap top warm in my snuggie watching the show The Middle. Such a funny show. So I am going to do better keeping up my everyday life on the blog. Can't make a book out of facebook posts! Figure I can at least make the kids laugh in about 20 years:)
8 comments:
We have bath night too during the winter. Don't worry about that.
Just edit the picture in the RAW editor and then save as a jpeg and finish the editing in elements. Sorry the shoot didn't turn out as well as you'd like. We need to get together soon and share our learned skills!
Girl, You are awesome! The thing I think that stands out about you, is your confidence. I remember in College, when we would hang out after our Singles ward, you always had like a million people over for dinner at your apartment. I was always more shy, but you had so many friends. And I always met people through you!! That was impressive.
All of the things you said about being a mom, are probably all of the things I would say about myself too. I mean, I chose to be a Mom, and there are times when I just love it. But it's dang hard!! I put my kids off sometimes too. And that is one of the things I want to change as well. Not to yell, and to play with them more. Patience my child :)
I love this post, because it is honest, and yeah, you will look back on it one day, and probably laugh, but remember what you were going through. I guess we all need to be a little easier on ourselves.
And about your Photography. If you love it, just keep practicing. You are brave to take one class, and then think that you will take professional photos. I know people that practice for a year or two and then try to make money at it. I know you have talent. You just need to realize what it is :)
Good heavens, we never do baths every night, even in the summer unless the kids got really dirty that day. I think January has a way of bringing out too many negative feelings as we reflect on trying to improve ourselves. Plus, it's dang cold!!
We try to do baths everynight. If not Madi gets BO like she is a teenager-is it too early to make her wear deoderant? And with diapers I try to bathe everyday. Just us-but really it is a preference so I wouldn't worry too much about it.
As for the RAW editing, I personally feel you have better editing options in the RAW. More control-easier editing page. But stick with what you are comfortable with!
And I think that you are a fantastic mother. Much more involved and caring than many. But you need to stop comparing yourselves to other women!!! No one likes to show their weeknesses but EVERYONE has them. You are just to kind to notice them in others and then feel badly when you don't measure up. You may be surprised to know that I have been envious of you plenty of times! You are amazing and it is time you realize that!
First of all, I am glad to hear you are in a Snuggie... they are the best! Secondly, baths every night? No way! I remember as a kid getting a bath like every 3 days! :) We give Scarlett one every other day.
You are so hard on yourself, Wendi!Just keep parenting from your heart (not your head) and you'll have the best feelings and experiences! You're doing GREAT!
Baths every night? Totally not necessary; keep that pure skin hydrated naturally. The winter is really harsh on our skin, so who made up the daily bath rule for the kids anyway? LOL
Oh -- and I agree with the Jorgensen Family... You are SSSOO awesome!
About New Year's resolutions -- a Bishop years ago -- once shared that he makes one goal that rhymes with the year. Keep it general, so that it can apply to any area of your life. You'll be amazed at how that helps, and you don't even feel like you have to be perfect in every area!
For example: "closer to heaven" was mine for '07; that applied to everything. I mainly just needed to "listen" better. I've been pretty hard on myself too (ya' think?!), so this year's is: "try it again in 2010."
Have a wonderful day, and a super good new year! Love ya'!
Wendi,
First of all, you are so great at so many things. You are an awesome mom, you are truly dedicated to your faith, and you rock as a friend. And those are just examples of the many!!!
Secondly, as far as your photography, if it's something you like then who cares if the outcome is great. I love to bowl, but I am really awful at it...I don't care, I just keep on bowling.
Shawn says that it took him 10 years of practice before he could honestly consider himself a descent photographer. So, his advice, give yourself time and keep passionate about it.
And lastly, as moms, we all compare ourselves to other moms. If there is one job that we want to be doing perfect, it's raising our kids. But the truth is, we all make mistakes and none of us are the perfect parent. As long as your kids are happy than the rest doesn't matter.
I think your an awesome person and I appreciate your commitment to being such an awesome person!!!
we do not bathe the kids everyday. that is too much work. my kids love showers and it is soooo much easier. also, I love the middle. such a funny show. you are too funny. and i love your facebook updates!
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